Need for Speed: Undercover

System: Wii
Developer: Black Box
Publisher: EA
Genre: Racing
Players: 1-4

Note: EA has decided not to release any screenshots from the Wii (or PS2) version of this game. Rather than using misleading 360/PS3 screens, please enjoy these Atari 2600 Pole Position images.

In a way, the Need for Speed series reminds me of Sonic; not because they're both fast, but rather, the initial spark that made them so special has gone. They've spent the past few years roaming the streets together, changing their look, hoping something will eventually stick. Consumers turned their noses up at last year's dabble into the simulation side of things with Pro Street – resulting in a boom for plastic surgeons. Undercover sees a return to the much loved arcade-style racing and police chases - this time in a bizarre alternative world constantly haunted by the setting sun. It's almost like racing around an episode of CSI Miami.

There's a lengthy storyline tied into all the racing, with real actors delivering some of the corniest lines since that time a bunch of confused farmers attempted to do drugs. As the name might suggest, you play as an undercover cop out to win enough illegal street races to meet up with the top fat cat for a cup of tea and a place to put your handcuffs. The game offers an open world, with three cities linked together by highways, cleverly called Tri-City. When you're not competing in a race, you can freely explore this barren wasteland.

Oddly though, once you actually start up an event, all the side streets will be blocked off, forcing the race along a single route. Why even have an open world environment then? Cause enough chaos during a race (ie; hold the accelerator down) and you'll have a slew of police cars chasing after you. As if setting up all those thousands of fences didn't already get their attention.


They never make any attempt to bust the other racers, just you. Fortunately (?) everyone's plagued by the embarrassingly bad AI in this game. The police will occasionally form a road block that can be easily smashed through – other times they'll come at you head on, before suddenly veering off into a wall or something. The longer you stick with a single car, the more heat you'll get as the game progresses - but none of their tactics are too effective. Besides, upgrading your car or switching for a new one makes the police forget who you are. Who knew adding spinners could change the look of the car that much!

The Wii version is the only one to feature a selectable difficulty level, but even on its hardest setting, Undercover offers little challenge. More often than not you'll find yourself pulling ahead of the pack early on and staying there for the entire race. Events can be started up via the map screen or by simply selecting ‘next event' while cruising around the streets. Other than the basic ‘win by holding button 2' races, there are a few mildly amusing Burnout style events where you have to cause as much destruction as possible within the time limit or take down a certain amount of cars. Don't get too excited though, as the crash physics are very poor. Slamming into a semi-trailer at full speed merely causes you to come to a complete stop, like a mime that's suddenly been frozen in a block of invisible ice while out on an invisible bike ride. What the hell happened here? Need for Speed: Underground handled collisions better, and that came out five years ago.

Tri-City is an utterly depressing place to be – it's basically a ghost town (or rather, three of them). Traffic is sparse, so there's no real sense of danger whilst screaming through the streets. Everything is so empty and boring; you'll be teased with areas that look like they'd be fun, only to find them completely off-limits. The open world gameplay is a total waste. There's no point in trying to explore it.

The game looks downright horrific, too. The textures are washed out, the cars seem to be made up with as few polygons as possible and the viewing distance is destroyed by a blurry and jagged mess. To make matters worse, the game almost entirely takes place during dusk, so you'll be dealing with the sun blinding you most of the way. For some mind boggling reason, this fantasy land has roads that are always wet. Always. It can't be because of rain, as there isn't any here. They can't be excited either, as the game is very boring. The light reflects off everything, as if you're driving into a nuclear explosion.


Despite the awful graphics, the frame rate struggles non-stop. It feels sluggish at best, but all too often the engine will start coughing up its vital organs in single digits. It's best not to even bother with multiplayer – everything bogs down to the stuttering level of GoldenEye 007. Even the video clips are badly compressed for some reason, I guess a DVD just isn't enough to hold the raw emotion of The Bold and the Beautiful-style drama anymore. The game features a great licensed soundtrack, with music from the likes of The Prodigy, Nine Inch Nails, Mindless Self Indulgence and Asian Dub Foundation. There are about 35 songs in all, but you'll have a hard time hearing any of them. Constant police chatter and the same canned sound effects tend to drown everything else out.

At least the cars handle well, with a nice sense of weight as you tilt the Wii Remote around. Too bad you have to pause the game and load up some menu screens if you want to change the camera angle. You can solve this by plugging in a Nunchuk and pressing the Z button, but then you lose out on motion controls as the joystick takes over. Smooth.


Score: 4.5/10 - "Avoid"
Please put on a better wig, Need for Speed – this one really doesn't suit you.

Review by Lance McGill (Infernal Monkey)